How to break negative thoughts

Do you ever find yourself going down a rabbit hole with negative thoughts? You might think of one thing and then that leads you to “what about this?” “Or that?”

And before you know it, you’re worked up. You feel stressed out or anxious. You might even feel really stuck and not sure how to move forward.

If any of this resonates with you, you’re in good company. This has been a personal struggle and it turns out it’s common!  A staggering 80% of our thoughts tend to be negative, highlighting the pervasive nature of this challenge (1). 

Negative thought patterns can act as barriers to your happiness, success, and overall well-being. They have a way of sneaking into your mind, distorting your perceptions, and limiting your potential. It’s essential to recognize and break free from these patterns to encourage a positive mindset and achieve personal growth (1).

How can we do this? How can we get unstuck from the muck?

Pause and get present 

We most often worry about the past (that we can’t change) or future events (that we may not even be able to control!). When doing this, you’re not in the present. To stop going down a rabbit hole with negative thoughts get in the present moment. You can do this by getting in touch with your body. 

Your body can only ever be in the present moment. Try any of the following:

• Place your hands on your heart. 

• Rub your palms together. 

• Feel your feet in contact with the earth.

• Listen to what you’re hearing in the moment.

• Look around you? What do you see?

Shine a light on it

Self-awareness plays a crucial role in identifying negative thought patterns. Name how you’re feeling. Seriously. Name it. Out loud. This can help explain why you’re thinking certain thoughts. But don’t judge how you’re feeling or the thoughts that you’re thinking. This is very important. 

Actively observing your thoughts and feelings can uncover recurring negative themes and triggers. You might even be surprised at what themes you discover. Being more mindful of your thoughts can increase self-awareness and reduce negative thinking (2).

So name how you’re feeling. But remember, no judgment!

Question the negative thoughts

Our thoughts are just that, thoughts. You can change your thoughts. I can change my thoughts. My daughter can change her thoughts. We can all change our thoughts. But this is so easy to forget. 

To break a negative thought pattern, challenge the negative thought. This can profoundly impact you mentally (3). I once heard someone describe this as fact-checking your story. 

Ask yourself – is this true? 

Or imagine if a dear friend or child came to you with these negative thoughts. How would you respond? With kindness, compassion, and maybe even shock by how harsh the thoughts are. Treat yourself with that same kindness, that same compassion.

Move your body

Changing your physical state can help you get unstuck. When you move your body, several powerful mechanisms come into play. Firstly, physical movement stimulates the release of endorphins, commonly known as “feel-good” hormones, which help boost your mood and reduce stress levels. The surge of endorphins creates a natural high, providing a sense of euphoria and well-being, effectively countering negative thoughts and emotions.

Movement also serves as a distraction from negative rumination. Your focus shifts away from repetitive negative thoughts, giving your mind a break. Your attention is guided to the present moment and the physical sensations of movement, creating a mental space that is less susceptible to negative thought patterns.

Plus, moving your body promotes increased blood flow and oxygenation to the brain, enhancing cognitive function and clarity. This heightened mental state helps you to gain a fresh perspective, find creative solutions, and challenge negative thoughts more effectively. Movement also helps reduce anxiety and tension by releasing built-up energy and providing an outlet for emotional release.

• Go for a walk. Even to the mailbox and back. 

• Vacuum your house.

• Turn on some music and dance around (I like to do this in the kitchen).

• Move with yoga.

• Take the trash out.

Determine a tiny action

You’ve gotten present, named how you’re feeling (with no judgment), challenged the negative thoughts, and moved your body. Awesome job! 

Now. What’s a tiny action that you can do to move forward? This could be something to help you move toward a goal you have. Or it could be something that helps you get back to yourself. 

It’s crucial to make this action tiny because when you’re stuck in your thoughts a little nudge can move you forward. 

Small actions help you build momentum. 

Small actions create clarity.

Small actions lead to big impacts.

Negative thoughts happen. They just do. But you can take steps to break the negative thought pattern before you go too far down that rabbit hole. Be patient with yourself.

To read more about taking action read this article on Taking Imperfect Actions.

Sources:

1. Routledge, C. (2018). 10 Brilliant Social Psychology Studies. Psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/more-mortal/201803/10-brilliant-social-psychology-studies

2. Baer, R. A., Smith, L. S., Krietemeyer, D., & Lykins, L. E. (2011). The Effects of Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy on Depression and Anxiety in Women. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 58(3).

3. Needleman, L. D., & Fisher, G. L. (1994). Cognitive Restructuring: A Review and Practical Guide. Journal of Cognitive Psychotherapy, 8(4).